New Year Rituals: The Personal Practices of Wize Women

Doors don’t open themselves; we open them with the way we arrive. I wanted the New Year to feel less like a sprint and more like a crossing, so I explored the rituals that make time feel sacred and change feel possible—without the pressure cooker of perfect resolutions.

I start with a sensory memory: chili that slow-cooked all night, cornbread stacked high, a fire rumbling while friends drift in from the cold. From there, I name what a ritual really is—purposeful action done with presence—and why it beats a rule-bound resolution every time. You’ll hear from my circle of Wize Women, whose practices range from throwing the I Ching to choosing a word after meditation, from clearing closets and calendars to writing down every win so the mind stops leading with failure. I hold space for humor too: a neighbor who calls the police, a guest in a green silk gown, and a mischievous nun who breaks the tension with a one-liner that sends everyone into laughter.

The throughline is alignment. Most goals start in the head and stall. I explain how to engage the five bodies—physical, energy, emotional, mental, intellectual, and Divine—so intention is grounded, fueled, felt, focused, and meaningful. That’s where real change takes root. You’ll hear practical ways to review your year without shame, release what no longer fits, and step forward with a word, a breath, or a bowl of Hoppin’ John as your quiet ceremony. Along the way, I share how this very podcast grew from a year of steady writing into a home on Substack, and how a single intention to teach again sparked an invite to a live platform within days.

And here's the LINK to the live, free class I'm teaching on January 9, 12:00 PM EST.

Come for the warmth, stay for the tools, and leave with a simple plan to cross your threshold inspired. If this conversation helps you reimagine your New Year, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review—then tell me: what ritual will you carry into the year ahead?

Chapters

• 0:10 New Year’s Parties As Living Ritual
• 1:20 What Makes An Action A Ritual
• 3:49 Broken Promises, Rumi, And Intention
• 5:54 Women’s Rituals: I Ching And Themes
• 7:23 Clearing Clutter And Setting Intentions
• 9:05 Reframing Success And Choosing A Word
• 10:52 Coins, Burning Lists, Or Letting Go
• 12:07 Party Chaos: Police, Nun, And Laughter
• 14:13 Deep Dives: Fitness, Fasts, And Lists
• 16:42 Ireland, Illness, And Healing Rituals
• 18:00 Listing Accomplishments To Reset
• 20:09 Goals, Substack, And Starting A Podcast
• 22:08 Main Intention: Teach Online In 2026
• 22:38 The Five Bodies And Real Alignment
• 24:05 Rituals Versus Habits And Closing

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:10

So, Delia, do you remember the great New Year's Day parties you used to have? I always loved a good New Year's Day party. Everyone was hung over and in need of the hair of the dog, some grounding food, and good friends who were all in the same condition they were. You know, those parties cost a fortune, but it was worth it. It was my way of saying thank you to all my students, clients, and wonderful friends who had been part of my year. New Year's Day parties became a kind of ritual. It could be freezing, sometimes snow still on the ground. I had planned and prepared the menu, sent out invitations well in advance, had the fire going and the wood burning stove and the kitchen table groaning with fabulous food. There was always a chili in the crock pot that had been cooking slowly all night, and a platter of cornbread stacked next to it. It was all vegetarian fare. It was a feast and a sight to behold when you walked in off the porch into the warm kitchen alive with people and those divine smells. You know, ritual is the way humans have always spoken to the unseen. Long before words were written, we lit fires, gathered in circles, told stories, sang, danced, prayed, and repeated sacred gestures so life would remember us and we would remember ourselves. Through ritual, ordinary moments became doorways. And today I want to share the rituals of women who have found their own ways to mark these sacred crossings. Stories of simple practices, deeply held, each one reminder that the turning of the year is not something we rush through, but something we enter. You're listening to stories. I'm your host, Delia Quigley. And today I interview myself along with my tribe of wise women. Okay, Delia, so what exactly is a ritual? A ritual is something we do on purpose. It's an action we return to with presence to mark change or honor what matters, and really to remember who we are as humans. It requires only your presence. Now, it can be as simple as lighting a candle each January or returning to the same place year after year, or burning your written intentions beneath a full moon. In many religions, rituals mark important events in one's life, such as a baptism or wedding, or receiving first communion. What transforms an action into a ritual is the intention you carry in your body and the reverence held in your heart. You know, Delia, I think rituals are also a time to remember where you came from and where you want to go. That's a good point. It's kind of a digesting of the memory, of the past, and then putting it to bed. It's just putting it to sleep, saying, okay, we're done. Thanks for the memory. It's made me who I am. But most of all, I think what's really powerful about rituals and the memories they carry is they allow you to remember how you've grown from year to year.

unknown: 3:43

Ha!

SPEAKER_00: 3:44

Despite all your broken promises and resolutions. Of course, the Sufi poet Rumi wrote this poem just for the occasion such as this. Come, come, whoever you are, wanderer, worshiper, lover of leaving, it doesn't matter. Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vow a hundred times. Come, come again, come. I love this poem. And there'll be a thousand other chances to try again. After a thousand promises you break. That's the challenge, right? Be impeccable with your word. A thousand times you'll break your word. Never take anything personally, a thousand times you'll take it personally. Assume nothing, and a thousand times and more times you will assume. And then you will think you did your best, and a thousand times you will fall short for some obscure reason. And that is what life's all about. But now, setting your intention as a ritual is saying, Yes, I can do this. I will put my mind to it, I will put all of my five bodies behind this intention, and it will be done. Ooh, Delia. Reminds me of the Brady quote. Yes, but cultivated, that quote's cultivated from many sources. And it goes where your focus goes, your energy flows, and that's what grows. Okay, Delia, so what did you ask your tribe of women to send you? Oh, yeah. I asked each woman to text me her New Year's ritual. You know, something she does every year, and I have to say, not everybody did it, but I did get quite a few and was delighted to hear what they had to say. I'm going to begin with my friend Pat Fenda, who's who's shared her stories a few times on this podcast. Because she and I, every January 1st, we throw the Iching. It gets us a sense of the energies we're going to expect for the coming year. So that's a ritual she and I do, and we've been doing that for many years. And then Pat has a big costume party. Usually happens the first Saturday in January, which usually turns out to be the Epiphany or Russian Christmas. She said she started it about 20 years ago because that date was in commemoration of her father, who was Russian. So her first costume party had the theme, because there's always a theme, was Russian, with a Russian flag and woolly hats and big boots, and it was a huge success. She told me that she never repeats the same theme, even though everyone loved coming in their pajamas one year and they just wanted to do it again. Then, after she has this big party, she clears everything, clears her, you know, clears the desk, and sets her goals for the year. Then she prepares her financial records for taxes. And she said, that's about it. Now, Delia, that's a pretty extravagant set of rituals. I know. And some women are like that. And some women are really just very basic. So next one would be Lois, Lois Bermister, who's just a fabulous Pilates teacher. And she wrote to me and said, in 2026, it's all about awareness. Being aware of what I bring into my life, into my house, my car, my closet, my mouth, my heart, my mind, my checkbook. I look around and see unnecessary overload. I look inside and see unnecessary overload. In an even year, it's time to even it out. So her ritual is to look within and to see what needs to be cleared out. But now, then on the other hand, you have Deborah Fernandez, who has contributed several times to the podcast. And Deb says that my New Year's Day hope is to get my lazy ass to the theater to see Marty Supreme. So what you'll begin to notice is that for a lot of these women and yourselves listening, setting an intention is a ritual for you. And Christine Kerpine, her intention is that as she approaches her 79th year, her intention this year is to move her body, to laugh, to love, to eat nutritious food, and maybe to eat a wee bit of junk. Linda Wells wrote that, well, I always fall asleep before the ball drops, and then in the morning I get up and make hopping john and cornbread for the New Year's dinner for luck. Delia, did you hear from Andrea Beaman? I did, and so have most of you here on Stories Podcasts. So she texted me to say that one of my favorite New Year's rituals is to write down all the successes I had during the previous year. Any wins, big or small, so I can go into the New Year feeling accomplished and successful rather than feeling defeated and like I failed. Examples. Instead of I gained five pounds in 2025, I say I began a muscle-building routine. Instead of I made less money in 2025, I gained new followers and continued building my community. And the biggest success, I remained grounded, happy, and hopefully even when the world seemed like it was falling apart. Nice one, Andrea. Thank you very much. And also from Linda Helms. She wrote to me that I think my most important one is I always pick a word after meditation as my North Star for the year. I did a solstice questionnaire meditation this year, which I found profound and very helpful. It brought me into the new year. I always try to do a morning meditation focused on letting go and moving forward for the new year. And of course, as in many traditions, eating your favorite foods on New Year's Day is important. And I, of course, do that very well. I think that sums up my rituals, and of course, I always entertain new ones and allow for spontaneity within all of that. This year will be lots of music, sound bowls, and laughter. Oh, here's one by Denise Kaye. Denise says that many years ago my mother would tell me to put coins in my pocket for prosperity on New Year's Eve, bringing in the new year with abundance. For a while, my friends and I would write things down that we wanted to get rid of for the new year. Then at midnight we would throw it in the fire to let those burn away. I've done years of resolutions, lose weight, exercise more, eat healthier, meditate daily. For at least the last 10 or more years, I decided the hardest thing is to have no rituals or resolutions at all for the new year. First, I can't stay up till midnight anymore. And second, all is good. Actually, all is great. I try to do all of my rituals most days, but not always. I have resolutions all the time and don't always keep them. The disappointment of not being able to keep doing what I tried to start is a waste of my energy. So each day is a new day, not a year. All I can do is try to be the best me each and every day. Well, that's very inspiring. Thank you for those words of wisdom, Denise Kay. So Delia, it's story time. What do you say we go back to the beginning of this episode when you were talking about that New Year's Day party you used to love having?

unknown: 12:18

Ha ha!

SPEAKER_00: 12:18

Oh yes, that's right. That's a good one because I used to have this neighbor, she lived across the street, and if I had a party or if I had people over to the house, she would always call the police, just for whatever reason. And on this New Year's Day, she did. She called the police because someone had parked in front of her mailbox. And one of my guests was a beautiful young woman who had arrived still wearing her gorgeous green silk gown from the night before. So I asked her to answer the door and charm the police officer while I took the lasagna out of the oven and got it set up for my guests. When I got to the door, the police officer, who was young and handsome, was blushing and tongue-tied. But he rallied to inform me that the grumpy old woman across the street had lodged a complaint about all the cars parked on the back country road where there was never any traffic. Then, suddenly down the stairs walks this small white-haired nun and announces to the officer that the cocaine was upstairs if he wanted to try some. Get out of here! No, the three of us stood there in shock before all of us just dissolving into laughter. Now that was a good party. Wait a minute, wait a minute, Delia, wasn't that the one your friend ended up at the hospital having experienced a deadly allergic reaction? Yep, yeah, yeah, yeah, all my fault. She reminds me of it from time to time. And guilty as charged, I will once again sincerely apologize. And that brings me to our final two wise women. Let's hear from Cheryl Kennedy first. She says that like everyone, I do try to make lifestyle choices that may have gotten off track due to life, but I avoid doing quick fix healthy challenges and just try to settle inward for a bit and do a self-analysis of my personal life in regards to my mind, body, and spirit, and specifically what I can continue to work on and what I can implement to improve. Usually I like to have some fitness goal in the year that requires or motivates, inspires me, and 2026 will be to do an 18-mile hike in the Grand Canyon. Also, of course, after years of doing the body rejuvenation cleanse in January, I typically do a version of this, but again, trying to implement changes or habits that will be my lifestyle going forward and not just for a few weeks in January. To add to this, I begin the new year with a 72 water fast, which, as she wrote this, she is currently on. I look outside of myself as well as my relationships, personal and other, to see how I can improve, how I can tend to these. Wow, Delia, that's a lot of intentions and rituals Cheryl has. No, no, no, wait, wait, no, she's not done yet. She says that she also makes lists upon lists of to-dos for home, for work, for projects that are in progress and need to start. She loves to have an ongoing bucket list for travel. And she says I write out special events, travel, celebrations in a calendar. The act of actually writing it all so is very cathartic to me. And I've been doing this since college days. Just helps me to visualize the year ahead. Lastly, I choose a word or phrase that will be my mantra for the year. And I write it frequently so I see it. I keep a lot of these things close to me, but find with certain goals or lifestyle changes, it helps to make myself accountable to others as well as myself. So I'll often invite friends or family to join me. Now that's a woman who takes her rituals and intentions seriously. And then one fine morning I received a text all the way from Ireland from Mary Gillen. And she writes to me, New Year blessings to you, dear Delia. I spend Christmas with my youngest brother Stephen and his family in Waterford, Ireland. Traveled by train, which took seven hours, and it was delightful. I met lots of very interesting characters and the scenic views from the train were stunning. My middle brother John took ill Christmas Day and was admitted to hospital. His diagnosis is IPD. It's a lung disease, which is scary tissue on the lungs from COVID-19. I'm heartbroken for him. I feel my rituals for 2026 will be lung health through the practice of Tai Chi, yoga, and complementary therapies. So Delia, that's quite a list of rituals. Okay, so what do you do each year? Mm-hmm. That's a good question. Because I love starting things from the beginning. In the past, if I was starting a diet, it was always on a Monday, which I could then track through the week. For New Year's, I make a list of my accomplishments, even the simple ones. At the end of the year, I sit down with my copy of Ginny Ditzler's Your Best Year Yet. So all I need is a blank page and I begin my yearly ritual. I don't at first write out my goals. Instead, I start by listing what I said, my accomplishments. And some years the list is longer than others. They don't have to just be big achievements either, because it's really the simple, the steady actions where I showed up for my life. I cooked my own meals, I practiced yoga each morning, I took myself outside into the woods, along the water. I wrote consistently, I practiced kindness, I kept my camera busy, and I rested my body when needed. What's interesting is as my list grows, I experience a shift in the awareness of how my life unfolded. What began as a practical exercise became an acknowledgement. Well, a kind of homage really to myself, to the woman who made the most of 365 days. Okay, so my year did not pass in a vacuum. It was filled with mornings and afternoons and meals and then evenings and choices I made and ones I avoided making, the moments of effort, of doubt, of anger, the ones of surrender and patience, the ones of uncertainty. Most of all, the joy and the laughter I shared with my friends and with others. Looking over the list, I can see the rhythms of each season, the sudden changes that threw me, threw me a curveball, threw me off my balance, the guidance that prayer brought me, the profound stillness of my meditation practice. And in that scene, The old weight of shoulda, woulda, coulda lost its grip. Once the list of accomplishments is complete, I write down what didn't happen. No judgment, but just a reminder that some things needed to be postponed and some things needed to be released altogether. And then some were just never meant for that time to manifest. I really love how this practice frees me. It frees me up of the past, clears the emotional residue of the ear, so I don't carry it forward as regret or self-criticism. I highly recommend you try it for yourself. Yes, because for someone like myself who tends to have a lot of things cooking, I need tangible goals to remind me to stay on track. You know, I love to wander off-road and explore the unknown, and having specific goals brings me back on course, all of which means manifesting ideas may take longer, but they grow richer along my journey. Alright, well, give me an example, do you? Well, this podcast, for one thing, I've had it as a goal for a few years, planning and waiting just for the right moment. My first goal then was to write consistently, and in 2024, I began sending out the Sunday guidance about how our emotions run our lives. A year later, it felt the right time for the podcast. Then I discovered Substack and that it could house everything in one place. And so I made the big move. Okay, so Delia, so what was your main intention for 2026? Well, it was to return to teaching online. Once I set that intention and I sent it out into the cosmic web, I received an email, like just a few days later, from a platform called Learn It Live. They asked me to teach a free class for their January symposium, and there it was, a platform in which to build my classroom. Okay, Delia, so tell your listeners what it's about. Okay, well, it's titled Start the Year in Balance, Understanding Your Five Bodies for Greater Clarity. But Delia, what do your five bodies have to do with ritual and setting intention? Well, it's a good question because when we step into a new year, most of us set goals from the mental body alone. But true transformation comes from aligning all five bodies so your intentions become grounded, energized, intuitive, and meaningful. So in this class, I will explain each body, and then we'll take a look at how imbalance shows up in daily life in your bodies and the simple practices you can use immediately to feel more centered and directed as you set intentions and create your goals. Wow, Delia, sounds perfect for anyone seeking a fresh start or even a deeper connection to their purpose. Exactly. And you know what? It's free. I'll post the link in this episode's description so you can see it. Alright, Delia, any final thoughts for your listeners? You know, yeah, be careful. Be careful not to confuse rituals with habits. Just because you repeat an action over and over doesn't mean it's a sacred act, unless, of course, you choose to make it so, with mindfulness and awareness. At the beginning of a new year, ritual offers you a threshold, a moment to honor what you've survived, what you've learned, and what you're ready to release. It invites you to step forward, not with force, but with mindful listening. It's a profound, sacred, and beautiful experience that brings all five bodies into alignment if just for that moment. You've been listening to stories. I'm your host, Delia Quigley, and you can find me and read more Sunday Guidance, Five Body Wisdom, and this podcast on DeliaQuigley.com. Thanks so much for listening. Until next time,